Ballerina Vamps, Christmas Clowns, and Teen Frankensteins, Oh My!
My most-anticipated 2024 releases
Hello folks! We’re starting to get into awards season, which means I’ll also be watching every Oscar Best Picture nominee.
Horror is a reflection of the culture’s fears, and I think Best Picture is a solid litmus test of what ThE AcAdEmY believes is most culturally relevant.
If you’re interested in Oscar talk from someone who’s seen everything, check out The Cinematic and Other Cultural Endeavors of Miles Purinton for amazingly in-depth predictions and film content.
On the TV front, I finished Nathan Fielder’s The Curse, which was like a supernatural “Scott’s Tots.”
I also loved the ‘60’s Gothic Nightmare Castle with Barbara Steele and the ‘70’s mystery Identikit starring Elizabeth Taylor. Slotherhouse was as expected.
Upcoming Topics: Vampires Part Two, The Internet Part Two
This Week: 2024 Releases
Here’s what I’m most excited for in 2024!
I avoid trailers ever since M3GAN’s gave all the good parts away. Trailers should be an amuse bouche, not the whole meal! I’m going off pure vibes and attached names for most of these.
Lisa Frankenstein - February
Diablo Cody (Jennifer’s Body, Juno) is doing an ‘80’s teen horror comedy. Kathryn Newton (Freaky) and Cole Sprouse (Suite Life) star in this neon-drenched “coming of RAGE” film.
Loves Lies Bleeding - March
From Rose Glass, director of 2019’s Saint Maud, comes another A24 collab, this time with queer icon, a bloodied up Kristen Stewart. Looks like there will be violence, criminals, and bodybuilding.
The First Omen - April
The Omen, one of the 3 defining religious horror stories of the mid-20th century, is great for its killer soundtrack and a hell of a birthday party. I know nothing about this one except that this image is fucking sick.
Abigail - April
Ballerina vampire kid! This one’s from the directing team behind Ready or Not and the new Scream movies.
Alien: Romulus - August
As an Alien enthusiast, I must include this one, but I’m not a huge fan of the franchise or director Fede Alvarez’s 2013 Evil Dead. Also the cast is too pretty. We know it takes place sometime in the 57 years between Alien and Aliens.
Terrifier 3 - October
These aren’t my favorite, but Art the Clown is the best slasher in years. Now we get depraved clowning and the magic of Christmas!
Nosferatu - December
Director Robert Eggers’ The VVitch and the 1979 Nosferatu are two of my favorite films, so I am there. Remake this one forever!
Frankenstein
With recent cast changes, and a release date of “soon” this movie is still in early development, but I am sure of two things with Guillermo Del Toro: it will be GOTHIC and it will be TRAGIC.
Longlegs
Although Nicholas Cage’s body of work is subject to confusion over his ability, his recent work in Pig and Mandy, has been seriously stunning. From Oz Perkins.1
Maxxxine
Ti West! Mia Goth!2 Giancarlo Esposito! 80’s LA!!!!! West loves his homages and the early images are giving Showgirls, Dressed To Kill, giallo, noir.
The Toxic Avenger
Elijah Wood! Peter Dinklage! The original sure is something, so I feel like this will be bad but fun.
The Bride of Frankenstein
Maggie Gyllenhaal is producing! Which hopefully means more bride.
Your Monster
Labeled as a horror/comedy/romance, this is directed, written, and produced by the incredible Caroline Lindy! Yay!3
Recommended Watchlist
Hereditary (2019)
“The Shining of our generation” as David (hi David!) calls it. The most iconic film of the last several years, spawning copycats and engaging with themes that keep cropping up in the 2020’s. Every creative working in the horror genre has seen this movie.
Ti West’s X (2022) and Pearl (2022)
Likely mandatory viewing for Ti West’s Maxxxine and great examples of modern period pieces.
Ready or Not (2019)
A delightful horror comedy from the Abigail team, this one’s not very scary and the first of the budding Eat-The-Rich genre.
Frankenstein (1931)
Shadow of the Vampire (2000)
Jennifer’s Body (2009)
Next week, Vampires Part Two! More ladies.
xo,
the cat who just might be the spirit of your dead witchy grandmother named allie lembo
The guy in Legally Blonde who was deworming orphans in Somalia. Also the son of Anthony Perkins, who played Norman Bates in Psycho.
Currently being sued! Sounds bad.
If you’re viewing this newsletter on Substack, not email, the top photo is from this film. Credit to Will Stone.